Life is too short (Part 2)....

So last month I posted something about realizing that life is too short.  I shouldn't hold grudges for long periods of time.  I shouldn't think about the "what if's" and just do it! (sorry for stealing that from Nike).

Today is Veterans Day.  My 比嘉 おじいさん (Grandpa Higa; my mom's dad) was part of the 442nd.  When I was growing up, I would spend a lot of time with my Grandpa Higa.  A lot of the time he would take me to his 442nd gatherings.  I never really knew what it was.  I just thought of them as my grandpa's friends.

It was only in intermediate school I found out who they really were.  During our history classes there would be little sections about the Japanese-Americans fighting in WWII.  That's when you hear about the 100th Battalion and the 442nd.  I got curious and starting reading whatever books there were about the two.  My grandpa had most of the books that I "borrowed."  It's borrowing since we're family (I still have some of the books).

Anyway, I was 7th grade when my Grandpa Higa passed away.  It was at a 442nd dinner when it all started.  As my grandma and grandpa were about to leave to go home, my grandpa went into cardiac arrest (I think, that's the story my family tells me).  Me, my mom and my dad were at home at the time.  I don't know why I was home that night.  It was a Friday night.  Hmmm.

But anyway, my aunty calls to tell my mom that she NEEDS to get to the emergency room.  So my mom says that I NEED to go with her.  We rush to the emergency room.  Doesn't take too long.  We live 2 minutes away from the hospital.  We get there and are put into the other waiting room of the emergency room.  I didn't know this room existed.  But here we all were, my mom, aunties and uncles sitting and are told that the reverend is coming.  I suddenly go into panic mode, but they tell me that my grandpa is in a coma.  Still, I'm crying.  I think I'm crying the most out of anyone.  I guess I'm the most emotional one in the family (how'd that happen).

It's getting close to midnight, my grandma says that I should go home since there's nothing I can do (How rude!; stole that one from Full House).  Just because I'm in 7th grade.  Well actually the rules say that visitors under 13 are not allowed (good thing I looked older than my age back then).  My mom takes me home, even though I don't want to.

The next day, I am taken to my other grandparents' house.  I want to go see my Grandpa Higa!  But, can't fight my parents, especially my mom.  I have to stay the rest of the weekend upcountry.  I don't mind, usually.  I really like spending time with them.  Just that weekend was not the weekend I wanted to be visiting.  At least my mom is keeping me and my brother in the loop about things.  The doctor says that my grandpa's fever has gone down and my grandpa has responded once but hasn't come out of the coma.

Sunday comes.  It's dinner time, well dinner time at Grandpa and Grandma Nikaido's (5:30 P.M.).  That's when my mom calls and tells my dad that we all need to get to the hospital.  I don't know what to think.  It could be good news (he's up and okay) or it could be bad news (his fever has gone up and he's non-responsive).  We all head down to the hospital.  Worst 30 minutes of my life!

I know I'm not supposed to be up in the regular visiting area, but no one stopped me.  When I see my Grandma Higa, I know what news it is.  My grandpa is dead.  I can see it in her face.  She doesn't even have to tell me, but she does.  I'm just hysterical.  I don't know how long I was crying and holding my grandma in the hallway.  I make my way to his room.  I really don't want to see it, but I am forced into the room by my grandma.  She tells me to say good bye to grandpa.  I just shake my head and start to cry again (OMG I'm tearing up just thinking about it).  I never said good bye.  Even when the morgue came to take him away, I couldn't, I couldn't even watch them roll him away.

Now that it's almost 15 years since that day, I still haven't let my grandpa go.  I haven't said a good bye.  Not even at the funeral or any one of the services we've had since then.  I don't think I could ever let go.  I know I'm in denial.  I have had vivid dreams where he would pick me up from Japanese school (this was when I was 8th grade).  I have had dreams where I would be at my grandparents' house and he was there in his chair.

Since life is too short, shouldn't I move on?  I don't want to, not with my grandpa.  I think a lot of it was anger since I was only 12 years old.  Now, I don't know what it is.  I guess it's just the bond you have with a relative.  I cannot let go.  I think if I let go, I will forget.  I think that's why I have been avoiding visiting his grave-site.  Today was the first time in a LONG time I went to visit.  I even got lost looking for it.

Since I was there, I went to visit my great-grandparents.  I even got lost looking for them.  That's how long I haven't been there.  But I noticed that no one has been to visit either.  Everything is overgrown.  Before my grandma would go almost everyday to keep the gravestones nicely kept.

This is how I got my Japanese name, my grandma's mom.  Now I kinda want to do a family tree.  I don't know much about the Higa side of the family, or the Ouchi side.  When I find the time, maybe I'll work with someone in the family.

Happy Birthday Keani!!!

Today was Keani's 2nd birthday party.  What a day it was!  First off, NEVER go out clubbing till 4 A.M. when you have to go to a kid's birthday party the next morning.  Well, I think you can go clubbing till the wee hours of the morning as long as you don't drink as much as we did.  OMG 3 rum & cokes and 3 jagerbombs = hang over.  I was surprised I wasn't more sick, just dehydrated.

Anyways, enough of my drunken night.  It was a day of partying with little kids.  After less than 4 hours of sleep, I had to get ready for Keani's birthday party.  First I had to wrap his present.  I don't know why I wait till the last minute for things like this.  Plus I am so OCD that it took me 20 minutes to wrap the gift.  Majority of the time was making the bow.  So stupid, he's only 2 and his parents would probably just cut the bow off, but that's how I am. (^_^)

So of course almost everyone is there when I arrive.  Such a sluggish day for me (lol).  At first I thought it was going to be the family, but I forgot that Makana (Keani's older sister) is going to preschool so her friends were invited and so was Jayson's co-workers.  In all there were 15 kids at the party.  Plus a few extra "kids" (Erik, Nelson, Jasmine, etc. lol).

Of course the "kids" are in Erik's room playing on the computer.  Erik is glued to that thing.  He really needs a job!  Being unemployed this long is not good.  He's my age!  I would be thrown out of the house if I didn't have a job.  He's so spoiled that he gets to live rent free.  Free food, free utilities.  All this AND he doesn't have to work.  I guess all my anger is more jealousy (lol, yeah right).

Time for the party to really begin.  Time for the most important part of the party, FOOD! (lol)  So much food that I CANNOT eat.  But what I can eat is musubi and sushi, yay.  That's alright, I was still a little hung over.  The carbs did help a little with that.  After eating, I felt so tired.  While everyone was at the party, I went to Erik's room and just read my book.

After some time had passed, it was time for some games (Yay!).  These games were a little different than most birthday party games.  These were Japanese games.  So the first game was "How well do you know Keani?"  The people with the most wrong had to play the "batsu" game (punishment game).  This batsu game was the wasabi cupcake.  They had to pick a cupcake and the loser would be the one that found the wasabi cupcake.  The next game was putting the 10 recent presidents in order.  The batsu game was find the mini marshmallows.  The "losers" had to find 2 mini marshmallows in a pan of flour with their mouth.

Time for the kids favorite part of the party, CAKE!  The cake consisted of cupcakes, which all the kids were allowed to decorate.  What a bad idea.  Once they decorated the cupcakes, some of them started to eat them.  It was pretty funny, but unproductive.  Kids will be kids.

Now it's time for the birthday boy to see his birthday cake.  Time for some singing.  Yay, for Keani!

The party is winding down.  It's time to clean up.  The birthday boy doesn't want anything to do with the clean up.  Instead, he wants aunty Stacey to play.  So into the house he goes to get all his toys.  What a time for the hang over to resurface.  Who would have thought it can sneak up twice in a day.  I thought I was over the hang over, apparently not.  So as I play, my head is pounding and Keani is making high pitched siren noises.  How fun.  I bear through it though.

I finally get home.  The headache is still there.  It was off to bed.  I wanted to take a short nap, but it ended up being a 3 1/2 hour nap (lol).  What an interesting day for me.

Happy Bday Hello Kitty!!!

So, November 1st was Hello Kitty's birthday. I planned to celebrate it a little differently this year, since it was her 35th birthday (wow, Hello Kitty is older than me).

For a couple of weeks, I planned to bake a cake with the Hello Kitty cake mold that I have. Also, I planned to use the extra batter to make cupcakes out of the Hello Kitty cupcake molds I have. These I would give to my coworkers.
It was my first time using the cake mold. Didn't know which instructions to use to bake the cake. Ended up taking almost an hour to bake. As you can see from the first picture, Hello Kitty has a nice tan to her (lol). I still think it looks cute.

With the cupcakes, I've used them before for chocolate cupcakes but white cake mix is so much different than chocolate cake mix. I have had bad experiences with white cake mix. So I tried my hardest to make this batch work.

After about 2 hours of baking, I had to wait for the cakes to cool down. What to do? I was going to play some HKO (Hello Kitty Online) but for some reason I wasn't that motivated. I think it was more I needed to catch up with all my errands that I didn't do. After I got back home from running errands, it was time for the cake and cupcakes to go into the refrigerator. Poor Hello Kitty, banished into the cold.

I'm not sure how long I left it in the fridge. Must have been 5 hours. Time for some decorations! I stuffed Hello Kitty's face with frosting. Sounds like a mean thing to do, but I didn't want to frost her face (lol).
For the cupcakes I left them in the cold a little longer. I did the same time as the cake. Here's the finished product for my coworkers. (They are so spoiled).
So now, it was time to destroy all my hard work. Yup, that's right, time to eat Hello Kitty (lol). It's so hard to put a slice through all your hard work. I couldn't put it to waste.
So I did it. I cut Hello Kitty (T-T). I have to admit, Hello Kitty tasted really oishi!!!